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SJA - Smitten

sarah jane
Title: Smitten
Fandom: The Sarah Jane Adventures
Characters/Pairing: Sarah Jane Smith/Alan Jackson
Rating: PG
Spoilers: n/a
Summary: Sarah Jane finds herself lusting after Alan and isn't too sure she likes it.
Disclaimer: Sarah Jane et al belong to the BBC etc. I just like to have them over for play dates occasionally.
A/N: Beta'd and Brit-picked by persiflage_1; written for the prompt "across the road" @ smallfandomfest



Sarah Jane is heading to the store to pick up a few things for dinner. Luke and Clyde have assured her they don't need anything, they're busy up in Luke's room doing whatever 15-year-old boys typically do behind closed bedroom doors. She leaves the house, thinking that if Maria or Alan happen to be outside, she'll check if they need anything. She's thinking that one or both might be about, since Alan had been making noises the past few days about sprucing up the garden that he had 'really let go' so far this summer. Keys in hand, she heads for her car, glancing over at the house across the road as she unlocks the door.

Alan is indeed out, weeding around the small row of flowers lining their front walk. Sarah Jane opens her mouth to call a greeting, but stops. Her eyes open a bit wider and she finds speech is beyond her. Alan's arms are glistening with moisture, more skin than usual is showing as his sleeves are pushed up over his shoulders in the heat. He straightens up slowly and stretches, hands to the small of his back, twisting back and forth.

Sarah Jane blinks rapidly, trying to shake off her immobility, but she's transfixed. And feeling a bit flushed.

Alan pulls his shirt over his head and tosses it onto the doorstep. Pushing damp hair off his forehead, he turns and sees Sarah Jane standing by her car. She looks a bit unwell, so he calls out, asking if she's okay. After only a brief pause that felt like minutes to her, she replies that she is, and does he need anything from the store while she's out? She can feel her heartbeat racing and can only hope he didn't realize she was staring at him with her mouth ajar. He says he's fine, if a bit hot (oh, he has no idea how hot he is), but thank you. A bit numb, and unnerved, Sarah Jane climbs into her car. She looks up to check her rear-view mirror just as Alan is bending to continue his work, the waist of his trousers down just a bit, not quite far enough to see his bum, but just enough to give her a good hint of how it might look.

Pulling out of her driveway, she realizes she has no idea what it was she was going to the store for.

--

It's a few days later and she's found she feels nervous around him now. Things she never would have thought twice about doing before now give her pause; standing close to him, their normal idle chit-chat, everyday interactions that never meant anything, are now hard for her to bring herself to do. She doesn't want to show her feelings (that could become quite awkward) and now that she knows she's feeling them, it's as if he'll know too from even the slightest thing, even though it was never anything before. She knows it's ridiculous, but she can't help it.

She hasn't felt like this since... well, a very long time. It makes her feel young again, but not in a wholly pleasant way. She's a grown woman, completely in control of, if not her life, because god knows things are a bit out of control more often than not, then at least herself and her emotions. But this... This feels completely out of control. This is Maria's father. Her friend's father. Admittedly, he was her friend as well, but up until now “Maria's father” was about the only way she had thought of him. Now, though, every time she sees him, her mind flashes to that day in her driveway, watching him from across the street and a certain warmth flows through her. When she thinks of him, which is disturbingly often, it is not as a fellow parent or co-conspirator as it was before, it is as a potential bedroom partner, and that in itself is a scary notion.

In addition to the fact that she doesn't feel that she is in a place in her life where having a man in her bed would be the prudent thing to do (she is still working on the whole raising a teenager thing), how would Luke and Maria react? And the age difference is also a bit much. Goodness, she's nearly 20 years older than him!

--

Then a day came, as it always did, when the world was in peril and it was up to them, the four of them, to save it. This time Alan came along for the ride, as he seemed to be more and more apt to do in the past few months. It was his concern for Maria, or maybe his need for adventure, that drew him in, she knew this. Still she couldn't stop herself from wondering if just maybe it wasn't about her, a need to be near her, that perhaps he was feeling the same things she was. But then her logic would kick back in and she knew once more that she was most likely just reading more into things than were actually there.

The peril to all of them, and the world, reached its peak and in the perceived last moments, the day was won. Standing on top of a low hill, staring up at the recently re-revealed sun, they all congratulated each other and hugged. Alan hugged her last and she imagined she could feel heat coming from him in waves, or maybe that was just her own internal thermostat being dialed up. She looked into his face for a brief moment, hoping against her better judgment that she would see her desire mirrored in his eyes, but unfortunately (or was it fortunate?) there was nothing of the sort.

It was in that second that she set her mind to forgetting the image that followed her into her dreams. It was harder than she would have thought possible; he was always there, just across the road, in her living room, in her attic, standing next to her.

Always nearby, but still never quite close enough.

Comments

( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
tli
Nov. 27th, 2008 08:42 pm (UTC)
Oh, Sarah Jane! There was some lovely imagery and emotions in this, short as it was. I'd love to see some sort of companion piece to this, if not from Alan's point of view, then one of the children.
lachatdelarue
Dec. 3rd, 2008 12:00 pm (UTC)
I couldn't manage a companion piece, but box_in_the_box did!
It's over here; just wanted to make sure you saw it :)
chicafrom3
Nov. 27th, 2008 09:50 pm (UTC)
Oh, this was so beautiful! Very evocative and I think it's going to stay with me for a while. The last line just killed me.
persiflage_1
Nov. 30th, 2008 03:15 pm (UTC)
*hugs Sarah Jane*

Go for it, girl!
lullabymoon
Nov. 30th, 2008 07:22 pm (UTC)
Gorgeous! And quite sad as well. Great stuff!
wickedground
Dec. 1st, 2008 12:15 am (UTC)
the ending is so sad. Especially the last paragraph was beautiful written. I agree with tli's wish for a companion piece.
lachatdelarue
Dec. 3rd, 2008 12:01 pm (UTC)
I couldn't manage a companion piece, but box_in_the_box did!
It's over here; just wanted to make sure you saw it :)
box_in_the_box
Dec. 1st, 2008 08:47 am (UTC)
Let me also call for a sequel.

Alan wants her too, dammit!
box_in_the_box
Dec. 3rd, 2008 12:59 am (UTC)
You have inspired this, by the way. :)
(Anonymous)
Dec. 9th, 2008 06:41 pm (UTC)
A beautiful tale of unrequited love. Thank you. Your last line summed up a person at the moment in my life.
( 10 comments — Leave a comment )

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